Every Friday, I find my trusty new release lists and start checking out albums that strike me as interesting. That's the way the day started. I made it through one EP (which was fine) and one solid album, and then I was hit by a surprise album drop that ground everything else to a halt - and I do mean everything.

After 10 year away, my all-time favorite band dropped a new album and announced a single live performance. That's right, Neurosis is back. 

"We've forgotten we are wild so we suffer."
- Neurosis, We Are Torn Wide Open

For someone who writes a music/fitness blog, I do think I struggle to effectively write about music. This is partially because I've only been at this a little while, and partially because I am not a musician myself. And of course, there's the famous phrase of unknown origin: "Writing about music is like dancing about architecture." It's hard to use one form of expression to describe another. Where I have been successful, if anywhere, is in describing my emotional connection with music.

I have been listening to Neurosis since 1996, when I was working in a record store and was first exposed to them via a label sampler from Relapse Records promoting their then-newest album, Through Silver in Blood. I went on to see them several times on the tour for that album, although I don't remember if I bought the CD first or saw them live first in the First Avenue main room. I then went backwards, picking up their previous albums on CD and all that followed. I have seen them seven times to date, most recently at Psycho Las Vegas in 2017. I thought that would be the last time after the band announced their split with Scott Kelly after his admissions that he had committed unspecified abuses against his family.

From my first exposure to Neurosis through today, they have connected with me on a different emotional level than any other band, which I still struggle to fully articulate. Music, in general, moves my body and my mind. Neurosis moves my soul. A Neurosis song has always felt like a journey into my own inner world, a doorway into a cosmos contained entirely within myself. My son does a thing he calls "going into the Mind Realm," which is when he gets lost in his own inner world, usually unlocked by fiddling with a piece of string he carries with him everywhere. Neurosis is my key to my Mind Realm.​

At the same time, Neurosis has always had an affinity for the connection with the Earth - it's not a coincidence that the new album was released on the spring equinox. Not only is this reflected in their songs, but I will never forget that during their Ozzfest set in 1997, they had people walk through the crowd with a banner that read "Protect the Earth." This kind of activism might be common today, but for a band to espouse such lefty idealism at a festival that also featured bands like Pantera and Marilyn Manson seemed incredibly bold back then. 

Since the allegations against Scott Kelly came to light, the amount of time I spent listening to Neurosis has dropped a bit, but I was still able to enjoy their music because the rest of the band struck me as people of such integrity, and the band always seemed to operate as a collective rather than elevate any one individual as the face and voice of the band. Still, I had made my peace with the fact that my favorite band was probably done. Individual members, Steve Von Till in particular, still produced interesting musical projects that helped scratch that itch. 

I had started hearing rumors/predictions that Neurosis would be announced as the final headliner for this year's Fire in the Mountains festival. Today, we learned that is in fact true, and the band has a new album out now with Aaron Turner of Sumac replacing Scott Kelly. An Undying Love for a Burning World is an incredibly heavy and dense collection of songs, which I am still absorbing. Unsurprisingly, the album's title captures perfectly my prevailing sentiment for the last several years: the world is dark, chaotic, and scary. It is also beautiful and worthy of love. 

Turner's addition changes the chemistry of the band, but it is still unmistakably Neurosis. It is towering, crushing, and gripping. It is frightening and full of empathy. It is music unlike anything from any other band. For me at least, there is no other band like Neurosis.

I cannot miss the return of the most important band in my life, which is why I've secured my ticket for Fire in the Mountains. As a festival that stresses reconnecting with the natural world, I can think of no venue more appropriate for their resurrection. 

Rise run feed ripen
Wound wither fall rise again
Run feed ripen
Wound wither fall rise again
Run feed ripen
Wound wither fall rise again
Run feed ripen
Wound wither fall rise again
 
- Neurosis, A Chronology for Survival